Dear Gemstones, "Is it time to leave him?"

Dear Gemstones,

Thank you in advance for listening. I feel like I can't turn to my friends right now because they will judge me instead of helping me. I have been dating this guy (Rick) for about 7 years now. We have had some issues on and of but we always seem to find our way back together. This past Valentine's Day he promised to take me out to dinner - due to our work schedules we don't get a lot of date nites. Anyway, I was very excited. I bought a new dress, got my hair done, and had a few girlfriends over to help me get pretty. Long story short - he never showed and never called. I was utterly embarrassed. The next day his excuse was that he was doing something for his mom and couldn't get away and his phone died. I know he does a lot for his mom but I am really at my wits end with dealing with his crap.

Please help!

Dear Gemstones, "I have bad friends..."

Hi Gemstones!

I hope that my email gets answered because I really need some unbiased opinions. Once you see what I am asking you will understand why I can't ask my "friends" for help.  It seems like I always let bad friends in my life, they end up being just horrible to interact with. Eventually I decide that it would be just best to separate myself from them for a while. But somehow I forgive and end up interacting with them again. 

The same thing happens over and over with different groups. I thought I was pretty good at judging folks character but now I am second guessing that. Some of these people have been friends for 20+ years others I have recently met. I'm starting to think that everyone on this earth is a terrible friend.

How do I stop letting bad friends in my life? Could it be me?

Dear Gemstones: Guys are fighting over me...

Dear Gemstones,

Hey! So I'm in 24 yrs old two guys are fighting over me (I know.... awesome but yet terrible, lol) One of them, I have known for a long time. We grew up together and we talk all the time. The other I really don't know very well and recently just met him thru mutual friends. Guy #1 and I get along great but Gyu #2 and I really clicked immediately. Now that I am for sure that both guys are interested in me, I am not sure what to do. Should I date one and dismiss the other and if so, which one? Should I date both – but at what cost as far as issues are concerned?

The main problem is that they both know that the other has feelings for me. Our town is small so people end up in the same places often. When these guys see each other out and about, it usually doesn’t end well. It hasn’t gotten physical but there has been a constant exchange of words.

Please Help!

Desired and secretly loving it!

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If you would like to submit a letter to the Gemstones for advice. Email us with the subject "Dear Gemstones". We believe that you can't make all the mistakes in life yourself so you should learn from others.

Disclaimer:
30s & Life Blog respects your privacy and take protecting it seriously. Emails received requesting advice will be shared on the blog but WILL NOT list your email address and any identifying information in the email body will be blocked/omitted for your protection. We ask that if names are included, you change the names to protect parties involved. No email will be forward outside of the 30s & Life Blog email account.

 

Need Advice? Ask the Gemstones:

Sometimes we all need some advice about something. When the advice we seek is about a situation that could be embarrassing or we just do not want others to know about, we feel as though we have no where to turn.

This is where the Gemstones come in. We are a group of 30-something ladies that have experienced many things in life. Some good, some bad but we are all stronger because of those experiences.

We started out encouraging one another and over time our sincere encouragement began to reach others. If you need unbiased and honest advice about a situation we urge you to contact us. You don't have to ponder on things alone.

If you would like to submit a letter to the Gemstones for advice. Email us with the subject "Dear Gemstones". We believe that you can't make all the mistakes in life yourself so you should learn from others.

 Disclaimer:
30s & Life Blog respects your privacy and take protecting it seriously. Emails received requesting advice will be shared on the blog but WILL NOT list your email address and any identifying information in the email body will be blocked/omitted for your protection. We ask that if names are included, you change the names to protect parties involved. No email will be forward outside of the 30s & Life Blog email account.

Dear Gemstones: Newly Single

Dear Gemstones,

I recently got divorced and have two kids. I was with my ex for about 8 years. I would like to get back in the dating world. I am not looking for a rebound relationship or necessarily a long term relationship. I want to date and have fun. Here is the problem. I don't know how to do it. And I am unemployed and have been for about 2 years. In addition to that I suffered from depression as a result postpartum and abuse from my ex-husband. I am a lot better and being treated, but worry that these things will be an issue in dating. Do I tell a man these things? I want to know how I should go about dating or even just having fun. I am also concerned about dating since I have kids.

Sincerely,

Newly Single

Dear Gemstones: Sexually Unsatisfied

Dear Gemstones,

My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years. Until a year ago our sex life was hot and heavy. We always were creative in the bedroom and both were very satisfied with the sex life. In the last year the sex with my husband has hit rock bottom. No more spontaneous sex, no "creativity" with the sex, and he only last about 15 good minutes. We have talked about the problem and his answer is I should be more patient with him. Well my patience has about ran out. I even suggested he go see a doctor to make sure nothing medical is going on. His ego has not allowed him to make the appointment. I do have toys that I use to please myself but I didn't marry a toy... I want my husband. I don't want our lack of sex to end our marriage, but I am not sure if I can continue in a marriage when I am not pleased sexually.

Please help!!
Sexually Unsatisfied



* If you would like to submit a letter to the Gemstones for advice. Email them with the subject "Dear Gemstones". *

Dear Gemstones: Confused In Love

On Thursdays the Gemstones will answer letters sent in. Today's letter is from Confused in Love.

Dear Gemstones,

I am 31 yrs old, not married, no kids, and confused. I have a boyfriend - our situation is complicated  but we are together in a sense. I have been with him for 5 yrs. We have seen other people meet and get married during this time. I feel like I am living a real life soap opera. I want to be married, I want kids, and I want to be happy. I don't have any of that.

Long story short. I have caught my present "man" multiple times being unfaithful. When I try to leave him, he won't go and I must be in love because I won't leave him alone. It has gotten so bad that he has a baby on the way with another woman. I guess I have hopes that he will change and make me an honest woman. My friends have been telling me for years to leave him alone. My situation as actually chased some friends away, but that just makes me ask if they were ever real friends at all.

I don't know what to do. Do I stay with him and risk missing out on things I want? Or do I leave and try to find happy with someone new? If it works with him I will be more than happy.

Please help,
Confused in Love

If you would like to submit a letter to the Gemstones for advice. Email them with the subject "Dear Gemstones".